Patrick: Author?

By thePatrick

Just a heads up for those of you with other things that you need to do, this post may be rather long. But here it goes. I have decided that Festivus is an amazing thing. For those of you that don't know what I'm talking about, check out http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Festivus. One of the best parts about Festivus is the public airing of grievances. Now, supposedly, you are only supposed to talk about the ways that your family has disappointed you, but I propose that we expand that to the ways that people in general are disappointing.
"What brings this on?" you may ask, and "What's the deal with the title of this blog?" Well, let me tell you. Today, Raisor and I were talking while we were at work, surrounded by an overabundance of stupidity. We started talking about things that in general pissed us off. Stupid drivers. People who walk slow in front of you. He mentioned my CNN post the other day. The list grew and grew. It didn't help that as Raisor was driving, we were surrounded by people who won, but only that very first race that gave them life (if you don't know what I'm talking about, think hard. Everyone wins one race. Still have questions, I'll be glad to clear it up.)
Now, for those of you that don't know, Raisor is quite the artist. You really should check out his blog, linked in my sidebar. He seems to think that I have a gift for writing. Maybe it's because I don't edit, I just type like I would speak. Regardless, we decided that we needed to combine my writing, his art, and our overabundant skepticism and write a book. It is tentatively titled Make the Dumb Go Away.
Anyway, I think that it's going to be just a light book, with nothing too in depth. We will have chapters written basically like blog posts about each subject. If you're interested, I would even post drafts on here. But now I'm jumping ahead of myself. We do have some ideas on things to write about: bad drivers, people who have to one up you, why you should be allowed to mount a 50 caliber on top of any civilian vehicle, memory loss, and other things. Additionally, I've thought of: not being 'that guy' at a concert, not being 'that guy' in your class, and why increasing your admission rates to a university will effectively lower the collective I.Q. of the gene pool.
Naturally, we want people to laugh when we read this book, or at least start carrying more handguns. Whatever. But I think we need your help. So, in all earnestness, I turn to you, my six or so readers. Is there something that you see around you that makes you want to, in the words of Norte, punch a baby lamb in the face? Are you surrounded by people who won once and never again? Are there people in your life who, if they no longer were around, civilization as a whole would not only thank you, but they would create a universal holiday celebrating your majesty? Let me know!
So, that's about it. Stupid people run rampant, and we all have to deal with them. Maybe I'm trying to make this contribution to the world so it's a better place for my children to live. Sorry this is so long winded, but just know I love you all, because we can air our collective grievances about the stupidity of mankind.
Graci.
p.s. Today, Christy saved an orphaned baby duckling. More on that story with my next post.