Now, before you run off to your hidden bunker with a year's worth of dry packed potato pearls and 300 refilled two liter bottles of water, let me explain. I am afraid for mankind. I don't know exactly what is going to happen, but time is running out. We need to get our top scientists on this pronto.

And this doesn't even begin to cover what we should do once the Zombie Apocalypse comes to pass.

It's simple really. We have run out of disease names. Allow me to explain. Everyone knows that the most recent "horror" is Swine Flu. For someone that echos my thoughts, read here. It was posted May 5, but still. So, Norte and I were talking with some other coworkers, and decided that the next big disease to come, following Swine and Bird Flu, had to be something creepy.

Monkey Pox.

But, small problem. Monkey Pox already exists. Really. I was shocked too. Apparently it's passed on by prairie dogs, or something. Then, upon Norte's return from the Bahamas, we thought that we'd hit the motherload of all creepy, scary, run for the hills diseases. A combination.

Swine Pox.

Alas, Swine Pox is a real disease, too. So, I propose we do what must be done. Yes, it's radical, but it's something that must be done to protect those who are forced to name diseases. Stop giving vaccines. Then, all the diseases that don't exist anymore can come back with a vengeance. Welcome back, Polio! Hola, Smallpox. We missed you all.