See, Christmas Really IS for Everyone...

By thePatrick

"But Patrick", you may say in protest, "sure I like Christmas, but the songs and movies are so bad. I mean, if we were all still living in a suburban paradise in the 1950s they would be swell, but what is there for me?"
"What could you mean?" I reply.
"Well, I love Christmas, don't get me wrong. But I also love death metal. And Arnold Schwarzenegger movies/quotes. What could possibly exist that could help me better celebrate the holiday season?"