Random Ramblings

Procrastinating the Inevitable...

Do You Know What Time of Year It Is???

By thePatrick

March - The third month of the year in the Gregorian Calendar, and one of the seven months which are 31 days long. The name of March comes from ancient Rome, when March was the first month of the year and named Martius after Mars, the Roman god of war. In Rome, where the climate is Mediterranean, March is the first month of spring, a logical point for the beginning of the year as well as the start of the military campaign season. March has multiple holidays and observances, including but not limited to: American Red Cross Month, Colorectal Cancer Awareness Month, Women's History Month, St. David's Day, National Reading Day, World Maths Day, International Women's Day, Pluto Planet Day, Pi Day, Save a Spider Day, St. Patrick's Day, St. Joseph's Day, Vernal Equinox, World Water Day, Pakistan Day, etc., etc., etc. Also notable is March Madness, the beginning of the Annual NCAA Men's (and Women's) Basketball tournament.


Mustache - facial hair grown on the upper-lip. The term implies that the wearer grows only upper-lip hair while shaving the hair on his chin and cheeks. Shaving with stone razors was technologically possible from Neolithic times, but the oldest portrait showing a shaved man with a mustache is an ancient Iranian horseman from 300 BC. In more modern history, moustaches have been worn my military men. The umber of nations, regiments and ranks were equalled only by the number of styles and variations. Generally, the younger men and lower ranks work the smaller and less elaborate mustaches. As a man advanced in rank, his mustache would become thicker and bushier, until he was permitted to wear a full beard. In Western cultures women generally avoid the growth of facial hair; though many are capable, the majority of these women remove it. Some women, however choose to embrace this growth, often in the form of thin mustaches. Mexican artist Frida Kahlo famously depicted herself in her artwork with both a mustache and a unibrow. Most men with a normal or strong mustache tend it daily, by shaving the hair of the chin and cheeks, to prevent it from becoming a full beard. A variety of tools have been developed for the care of mustaches, including mustache wax, mustache nets, mustache brushes, mustache combs and mustache scissors.

So why is this important? Because it's Mustache March!!! Woot! So, celebrate like you mean it. Guys and girls, grow that upper lip hair. Salvidor Dali, Burt Reynolds, Borat, Frank Zappa, Albert Einstein, Teddy Roosevelt, Joseph Stalin. It doesn't matter who you emulate, but participate in the greatest month long holiday there is. It'll make you proud to be alive.




Happy President's Day...

By thePatrick

Because Presidents are awesome, and because I'm lazy:

Click here.

Better Than The Average Post...

By thePatrick

Rather than post some boring facts about myself and what I've been up to, I decided that everyone needs to learn some facts about Polar Bears. Besides, you can only post so many times about studying for the GRE before your mind dwindles down to nothing.

-The polar bear is the world's largest land predators. They can be found in the Artic, the U.S. (Alaska), Canada, Russia, Denmark (Greenland), and Norway. Each of these countries either banned hunting or established rules for how many polar bears could be hunted within its own boundaries. These rules help keep polar bear populations stable. Today, 25,000 to 40,000 polar bears roam the Arctic.

- Baby polar bears are much smaller than human babies when they're born. They are the size of a rat and weigh little more than a pound. They can grow to full man size in a year if they have lots of food.

- Polar bear babies like to pretend like they can crawl up stairs, but really only put their arms on the landing and then thrust themselves up. They can only do this on the landing, and as of yet, cannot make it up more stairs.

-Male polar bears may grow 10 feet tall and weigh over 1400 pounds. Females reach seven feet and weigh 650 pounds. In the wild polar bears live up to age 25.

- If a polar bear was pulled over on Sunday afternoon in Paradise, UT for running a stop sign, not only would they not get a ticket, but they would eat the Sheriff's face off.

- Despite what we think, a polar bear's fur is not white. Each hair is clear hollow tube. Polar bears look white because each hollow hair reflects the light. On sunny days, it traps the sun's infrared heat and keeps the bear warm at 98 degrees F (when they're resting). Also, Polar bear fur is oily and water repellent. The hairs don't mat when wet, allowing the polar bears to easily shake free of water and any ice that may form after swimming.

- Not only do polar bears not have to study for the GRE, they don't even need to apply to Graduate School. Much like Chuck Norris, if they want to attend further education, schools just beg them to come.

- Polar bears have been known to swim 100 miles (161 kilometers) at a stretch.

- When polar bear wives need a new job to save their sanity, they get one, generally at a framing shop. Also, they eat their former boss.

- Polar bears have wide front paws with slightly webbed toes that help them swim. They paddle with their front feet and steer with their hind feet. Paw pads with rough surfaces help prevent polar bears from slipping up on the ice.

So there you have it. Who knew that the polar bear was such a fascinating creature?