Random Ramblings

Procrastinating the Inevitable...

No Wonder They Smell Better...

By thePatrick

Okay. Before I start this post, I want to make sure that everyone is sitting down. It's okay, I'll wait. Because I know that so many people now days take their computers with them wherever they go just to check up on my blog while walking around. Feeding ducks. Shopping for Hummus. Whatever. Sit down, and prepare to have your mind blown. Ready?

Boys are different that girls.

I'll let that sink in for a minute. Time's up. Anyway, there is nowhere where this is more prevalent than in the married bathroom. No, you sicko, I'm not thinking like that. I'm talking merely about the amount of crap that each one keeps in the room. Take our bathroom, for example. In our shower, my wife has twelve different bottles (not an exaggeration) , each containing either a shampoo, or a conditioner, or a shampoo/conditioner, or a body wash, or something. She has a pumice stone on a stick for her feet. She has a razor. Our little girl also has some stuff in there, but unless you count a purple squeeky alligator or a tugboat full of ocean animals, she doesn't take up a lot of room. You know what I have? Some shampoo that smells like soap, some body wash that smells like a guy should, and a loofah.

I'm not ashamed to admit that I use a loofah.

Then, we move over to our sink/countertop. There are communal items there. Our toothbrushes are there, along with the toothpaste. Naturally, there's some soap. We keep some contact solution there, too, since we're both blind-ish. So, where's all my stuff? I get one small drawer. If I'm lucky, I get to keep my contacts and glasses cases on the countertop, too. My wife gets the other three (one of which she shares with baby for hair stuff). She also gets the cupboards under the sink. And on the countertop, there's a basket full of stuff, a makeup bag full of stuff, and a stack of some makeup tins. Technically, we have a medicine cabinet, too, but the only thing I've ever kept in there is some NyQuil. Love that stuff. Other than that, I think it's all hers.

So why do I bring this up?

Because it's a good thing there are girls who are willing to share a bathroom with people who are fine with smelling with soap and take minimal items to clean themselves. Before I was married, I guess I was technically aware that there was a difference between a shower curtain and a shower curtain liner, but I didn't care what that difference was. Now that I'm married, not only do I know the difference, but our shower curtain matches our soap dispenser, toothbrush holder, garbage can, and toilet brush holder.

I'm civilized.

My wife, and countless numbers of other women like her, work tirelessly to get us to hang up our towels, put the seat down/up, and be considerate enough to spray something after we wreck havoc on the bathroom. In return, they spend hours (slight exaggeration) looking their best for us men-folk. I, for one, am grateful that my wife can tolerate my stench long enough to go out in public with me.

She already handles the moustache every March.

Tomorrow, to celebrate the fact that I'm going to be posting for 5 days in a row, I'm switching it up. See you all then.

4 Comments

Okay, I'm officially a blog stalker now. You are too funny. I used to care if I left a comment. But I have to now. It's Christy's fault. She had the link on her blog and I followed it and I've been laughing ever since. :) I hope you don't care.

Great blog! You have convinced me to hold off on getting married for at least another year because I don't want to know the difference between a shower curtain and a shower curtain liner. I don't think I am mature enough to handle it yet, but maybe next year...

I also use a loofah.

wreene (the 'w' is silent, perhaps?)

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